Dogtor Lola

Despite Lacie’s insistence that I learn statistics to get my degree in the doctoring of philosophy, I consider myself to be one smart pup.  So smart, in fact, that I think I should have my own TV or radio show where I give advice to humans in need.  Since I hate statistics, I will go by Dogtor instead of doctor.  And my show would be the Dogtor Lola show…

Dogtor Lola: “So tell me guest human, what ails you today?”

Human: “Well, my relationship is falling apart and I can’t seem to lose weight.”

Dogtor Lola: “Do you do any frolicing on a regular basis?  What does a typical day look like for you?”

Human: “No, I don’t really frolic.  I spend my days either at work in front of my computer, or watching the TV, listening to shows like this so I can figure out how to fix my life.”

Dogtor Lola: “Well there’s your problem!  First of all, if you’re watching TV or your computer all the time, how on earth do you expect to frolic?  Second, if you frolic you won’t be so chubby and pasty.  And third, if you’re not chubby and not obsessed with the TV or computer, your spouse will probably want to hang out with you and share your frolic time!  Problem solved.  My prescription is to turn off your TV, find a field (preferably one with squirrels), and frolic 1-2 times per day.”

And cut!

What do you think internet humans?  I’m pretty sure I’d never run out of guest people needing help.  🙂

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